Update: Shadow Wings, Chapters One and Two

I want to dig a hole in the ground and hide. 

My second chapter is twice as long as the first chapter with over double the words. The charries all sound exactly as I thought they would, (though Akeem seems much prouder and quieter than he is in my head, go figure) and the story is running pretty smoothly. There are plenty of problems though. The tenses are off, the story is taking a completely different swing than I originally planned it too, and I'm not getting the sci fi stuff in it right! It's hard to describe and write the illusion of reality when you've never really come in contact with anything that is close to it. 

I've also edited the first chapter a lot. Tenses are right now my bane. 

First chapter word count: 998

Second chapter word count: 2,117

Total word count so far: 3,115

Update: Shadow Wings Chapter One

First draft done! 

It's bad. As in, I had my little sister read it, and she was clueless that it was even science fiction. Ouch. But I'm still going on, it's just a first draft. I'll be making lots of notes on it for what needs to be changed. Three pages long when double spaced, much shorter than I first imagined it. That too will probably be remedied when I start editing. . .

I'm not sure exactly what I expected when I first started writing this chapter. Oh, I suppose I WANTED perfection, for the words to just magically show what I saw in my mind,  but that is certainly not what happened. I'll push on, and hopefully I'll finally come up with something I'm willing to post on here.

Word count for chapter one: 923

Latest Synopsis

After working really hard by myself to get everything written just right for my 'final' synopsis, I ended up talking it through with my mom and this is the result:

When the Zoic Betterment Program (ZBP) came and took Jesi Forbes, they turned her world upside down. The ZBP killed her family, her friends, and took her freedom. Now, newly trained as an elite bodyguard, she is willing to do anything in her power to bring the program down. With the future shrouded in shadow, will she succeed against all odds? Or will she become, just like Doctor Aceti and Mr. Atkins, an annihilator of her own kind?

Now I'm hoping to pick up the pace and get writing this next month or so. (That is, if I'm not bogged down with life. . . )

~SDG  

FINALLY

Yes, I FINALLY have a name for the organization that is the bane of all Zoics. The Zoic Betterment Program, ZBP for short. I cannot tell you how excited I am at finally finding/choosing the name for that organization. Hopefully, I can now get over some big road blocks now and get more done.

OH! I also found one of my stumbling blocks that I didn't even know I had until after some digging. I didn't have a proper villain for this story. Oh, I had a villain for the second or so book (Derek. . . I paid too much attention to you. . . -_-), I just didn't have one to defeat for THIS book I'm working on. Now I do. Meet the head scientist of the ZBP, Dr. Connie Aceti!

I am so happy that I finally have a good villain to use for THIS book! No offense, of course, to Derek. He's becoming quite. . . Freaky in my mind; Dr. A also is coming together very fast, and even a better then Derek did. . . Anyways, that's my update! Hopefully I can put up a new and improved synopsis by tomorrow night.

Sola Deo Gloria

*blows trumpets* Introducing a new title!

After going through the first twenty lesson for OYAN, I have decided that Breaking Free is not a very good title at all for Jesi's story. Jesi really doesn't 'break free' from anything.



*drum roll* The new title is. . .




. . .





. . .




. . .




Shadow Wings



The reason I chose this name is because Jesi's future is very uncertain (hence shadow), and she learns to become more or less a leader (hence wings). :) I am very happy with the title, it gives me so much plot bunnehs that I can add to it, and it perfectly fits Jesi's raven form. 

SDG